I didn't even touch the guy, ump!

A fool shows his annoyance at once, 
 but a prudent man overlooks an insult.
Proverbs 12:16

Team sport; some say the true character of a person is shown once they cross that white line.  Have you ever had words with an umpire or maybe given a little shove to the opponent?

I have reignited my passion for playing team sport this year and have enjoyed the rush of adrenaline and felt 'alive' as my pounding heart tries to tear a hole in my chest.  It's amazing how wired you can get from the whole experience, I know because a late game last night meant I only got 4 hours sleep.  In the moments of passion we are often confronted by the whistle of the umpire and the corresponding call that surely wasn't right, 'I didn't even touch the guy' (as the opponent lays sprawled across the court at your feet).

The ability to keep your mouth shut can make a huge difference.  The umpire will always get calls wrong, what you will find though is that the more you whinge and complain the more that calls will go against you.  Contain your frustration, the quicker your over it the quicker you get back in the game.

This proverb applies not only in sport but also in life and relationships.  It is the fool who unleashes their frustration, the better approach is to bite your tongue and overlook the insult.  People will always offend you and mess you around, it's part of spending your life interacting with other human beings.

Quick to apologise and slow to anger is a sure winner in relationships and marriages
(Hot tip for young players).

The pinnacle of human strength, you don't even have to lift a finger

Better a patient man than a warrior,
 a man who controls his temper than one who takes a city.
Proverbs 16:32

Challenge your concept as to what is really a strong person's response to conflict. 

Warriors are always depicted as the hero in our stories, the picture of a real man.  It seems counter cultural to suggest otherwise.  Yet this proverb proposes that it is the bigger 'man' who walks away from a fight.

The power of this concept was really highlighted to me when teaching the kids from the commission flats to make good life choices.  These kids face serious confrontations everyday, whether it be due to race, religion or even the estate in which they live.  As a kid, the world tells them to fight back and stand up for themselves because no one else will.

When you tell these kids that it takes more strength to keep your mouth shut and walk away because it is only the weak who retaliate, suddenly the game changes.  I have seen a kid fired up ready to start swinging, a worker gets in their face and starts challenging them as to whether they are weak or strong.  The strong person controls their anger and walks away, this becomes the new benchmark that the kids strive for.

The challenge this proverb puts forward is next time you feel yourself getting fired up and you're justifying your anger, remember that it is only a weak person who retaliates.  The strong bite their tongue, just like my mother always told me 'If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all'.